Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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