he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
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