I'm drive I can fine osifer
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
How does it feel to date your dad?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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