i barfeds in our rink
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Everything about him screamed your future.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
