The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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