So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
