I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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