garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
