My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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