I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Let's get the cat blown out
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
