thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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