Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
you mean i was at the winter classic?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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