Just took my morning after pill in the library
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Sorry my hands just texted you
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize
