Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize