why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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