I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I smell like Dick and happiness
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
