I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
