This dress was meant to end up on your floor
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Randomize