So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
