do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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