everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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