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It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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