My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
