I feel like abortions should bother me more
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
