JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
