I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
it glows. i had to have it.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
