I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
