No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
