and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize