Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
