I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
