I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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