I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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