The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
