I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
