is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
