i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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