I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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