Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
