we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
