She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
