HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
