dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
