...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
