Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
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