I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I know her cup size but not her name....
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