I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
