This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
We got so high we made milksteak
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
