You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
