like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
